The answer is no.

I guess I'm not ready to be super vulnerable with my blogging yet, because I just couldn't bring myself to write about Todd's "perfect" job last week when they called and left a message telling him that they were no longer considering him for the position. I had to process first. And now that I've processed... and prayed... and talked it out with Todd and parents and close friends, we wonder if maybe God had a hand even in this. Maybe it sounds funny to say that. "Maybe God had a hand even in this"... you might say that of COURSE God had a hand in it! But in my mind, it has not been so obvious. The job was at a church only 10 minutes away, doing something Todd could see himself doing after seminary, working in the same building as his uncle, only 20 hours a week, etc, etc. I couldn't picture a better set-up. When Todd called me to tell me that he hadn't gotten the job, it made me wonder if we had even made the right decision to move here. We haven't been able to close on our house yet, so we're paying rent & a mortgage - and then Todd's one very promising job lead gets slammed shut.

The very strange thing is that in the midst of, and almost overcoming, those doubts and even the grief, was a peace that I can't explain. Maybe it was naivete or a numbness, but I think it may have been God's way of reassuring me that He is still in control. And the thoughts that have comforted us since last week have been many... Other students tell us that it's too much to try to work 20 hours and take a full course load, we can now choose our own church to attend (rather than go where Todd works), that job wouldn't have been very relational - it would have been more administrative, Todd will have more time to volunteer and study if I work part-time instead of him, we do have savings (although it would nice to still have some savings when we're done here!), etc. 

The plan now is that I will continue to do YoungLives part-time long-distance, and possibly here in St. Paul as well. I'm also working on transferring my teaching certification to MN so that I can substitute teach. Subbing is flexible enough that I can hopefully work two or three days a week around Todd's schedule. He will watch Bethany when he's not in class, and we may try to work something out with a neighbor for the times that he is in class.

I think the hardest part about this was the fact that we feel like maybe Todd could have gotten the job if we had prepared more for the 2nd interview... but we didn't know what to prepare for, or that the 2nd interview would be so formal, and there's no way of knowing what could have happened. It's so unlike us to not prepare like crazy for an interview. But as Todd said during one of our conversations, "Maybe it was God who made us forget to prepare, because that's not where He wanted us."

Well, that's where we are now.

On a lighter note, here are a few recent observations I've had:
-It is now in the upper 40s to mid 50s. People are still wearing shorts (with sweatshirts). I would like to tell them that that's not going to prolong summer, it's just going to make their legs cold!
-Bethany, at 15 months, is in a super-cute phase of life right now. She pumps her fist while chanting "Daddy, Daddy" (or sometimes "Mommy, Mommy") and is saying "I wub oo" (I love you) and "where aw oo" (where are you) along with our names.
-Our upstairs neighbors were visiting a couple nights ago when we (as we often do) had a rush of bubbles fill our kitchen sink. Suddenly, they realized that they had just emptied the dishwater from their sink... so they smelled the bubbles, and discovered that they were theirs.

Guess who?

Bethany is really into imitating us these days... I have to be careful what I do around her! Todd and I often catch her walking around by herself repeating back to herself a sound that she just heard one of us say. Can you guess who she's copying in these pictures?

(Great Grandma Asper - Bethany found her cane and couldn't resist!)

(Daddy - she had already tried taking a few steps before Todd caught her and started helping her)

(Mommy - Bethany loves her "new" purse, but we need to get her her own keys so she doesn't lose mine...)

Bethany and I are hanging out at Grandma A's house in Des Moines with my sisters-in-law and Bethy's cousins while Todd and the boys go to L.A. to visit Todd's brother Jon Marc and go to some baseball games. Somehow all the girl cousins and aunt Mari ended up with the same outfit on our first day here... how cute!!

Bethany, Grace & Rachel with aunt Mari

On a slightly more serious note, please pray for Todd & his potential job at a nearby church. He had a second interview on Wednesday, and they told him that they would let him know within a couple of days. We haven't heard yet, and to be honest, we're getting nervous... the position seems like SUCH a perfect fit for Todd, and we're praying that the pastors have discernment and wisdom in this process.

Here we are!

First impressions/experiences:

• The walls in our apartment are not stark white - they have a little creamy/beige-y color in them. That makes me happy, since we aren't allowed to paint. (That tells you a lot about me that that's my first bullet point! There's just something about color that fascinates me... :-)
  
• I don't like the ants that I find crawling around the food that Bethany drops in the kitchen. At least the ant traps are slowing them down a bit.
• We have met great people here!! There are two other young families in our building who also just moved here from out of state, and we have spent a lot of time together watching the kids play at the playground, eating together, going to church, and hanging out after the kids are in bed.
  
• Plus, between Todd's cousins, grandma, aunts and uncles, and parent's friends, we have had plenty of people to eat out with, watch Vikings games with (we can root for the Vikings when they're playing the Browns, right?), and explore town with. 
• Yesterday we had a fun adventure with some friends of Todd's parents who are also seminary students. They took us to the St. Paul farmer's market - which was such a colorful, delicious-smelling experience in itself - but on the way back, we drove past the "Hmong Marketplace" and decided to check it out. It was a true outdoor market with fruits we had never tasted, music we had never heard, and a huge variety of ethnic clothing and foods. We felt like we were in another country!
• We are loving the fact that our baby monitor works in our new friends' apartments... we have already started talking about taking turns "watching the monitor" for each other so that we can go on late-night dates after the kids are in bed!
• We visited what is possibly the largest "charismatic Lutheran" church in the world this morning, and really liked it. It's the same church that Todd has a 2nd interview at for a position as an Adult Ministries Assistant. I've been to a few huge churches before and didn't feel comfortable, but I loved the worship at this one, the message definitely spoke to me, and there are lots of ways to get involved.
• I LOVE, LOVE the variety of free activities that are around here and that I can take Bethany to in the winter to get her out of the apartment. We have a really nice mall just a few miles down the road, and the Mall of America isn't too far away and is a really fun place to make a cheap half-day trip out of. Plus, we have a "free" (donations requested) zoo, conservatory, and Japanese garden just 15 minutes away!! The zoo is definitely a lot smaller than a typical city zoo, but it has all the animals that a toddler would care about! Lions, zebras, giraffes, monkeys, fish, flamingoes, tigers, leopards, and more. What fun!
• There's much more I could say, but I'll leave it at that for now. God is good to us and is providing for so many of our physical and emotional needs... in spite of my hesitance to take this big step!
  

 

I may dress Bethany in girly outfits, but when it comes to playing outside, she LOVES playing with the gravel and tractors at the playground on campus!!

 

You can see our LR & DR windows in the bottom right-hand corner of the building (in front of the fire hydrant... and right next to the front doors)

Living Room

  

Bethany's little "play nook" behind the couch and in front of the window. She can stand on the pew and watch people come in and out of the building!

Dining Room

 

My Itsy-Bitsy Kitchen